A Writer's Resilience


“What’s your major?”.

The most dreaded and bothersome question

I receive week after week.

Do I make it up?

Do I tell them I’m studying poetry

instead of BioChem or Engineering.

I feel guilt crawl up my throat like a spider

as I muster up the courage to say:

“Creative Writing”.

I pause,

for I know what is about to come.

“You’re writing’s not good enough”.

“You will never be published”.

“What are you going to do with a Creative Writing degree? Teach?”

“Where do you see yourself in 10 years?”

“You’ll never be financially stable as a writer”.

Phrases like these get spat out at me like a piece of old chewing gum.

They’re right.

I’ll never be good enough for people to read my words,

everyone speaks,

so what makes my words, my opinions, and my thoughts

matter?

But then I write.

I sigh as I create a love affair of pen and paper.

Words flow and fill the page like

brownies being spread evenly across a baking pan.

I am happy when I write.

So

I will write

because this is my passion.

My writing improves with time, just like everything else in life.

I will try every publisher in this city, in this state, in this country, in this world.

I am a poet and I want to write until my hands feel numb.

With a hardcover book in my fingertips with my name neatly printed on the bottom.

I will write poems for one dollar each on the streets if that’s what it takes.

Aspiring writers get slapped every day with discouraging opinions.

But you see, all these ignorant phrases

are just that…

You cannot predict my future,

and you certainly cannot predict the effort I will put into turning

my passion into a career.

The things that blind you from seeing the potential my dreams hold,

bind me to turning my aspirations into a reality.

When my pen kisses her crisp white paper, I know exactly why

I chose my major. Not for money or fame,

I’m a writer and I’m sensitive about my gift.

Instead of spitting out hate, why don’t you search for your own gift?

I feel as though all creatives studying their passion in college will relate to this piece. Personally, people always assume that my act of studying Creative Writing is in order to pursue a career in teaching later on. Both my sisters have teaching careers, and let me be the first to tell you that I will not carry on with their path. I'm tired of being shamed for trying to find a career that makes me happy.


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